Confession

After recently watching the movie "Brick" I couldn't figure out what else I had seen the character called "The Pin" in. In a last stitch effort to figure out why he looked so familiar I looked him up on IMDB. Turns out I recognized him from his acclaimed role in Material Girls....wow, how sad am I.

(side note: he was also in 3 episodes of 24 in 2005, don't remember that)

Les Triplettes de Belleville

Last night we "rebelled" and decided not to eat dinner at the college...I know, getting pretty crazy here at West Dean. But anyway, we went to Marks & Spencer and bought a bunch of Chinese take-away and had a lovely dinner back at the student accommodation. We decided to put on a film and ended up watching a fantastic animated story called "Les Triplettes de Belleville". It is a French film and has very little subtitles, it's mostly music and events. I highly recommend seeing it if you can find a copy as it was BRILLIANT!

Harold & Maude

This woman named Karen...who sometimes claims she goes by KG has a movie night every week at West Dean. (First let me just mention that when she tells people her name is KG all I can think of is KG and the power of three of Mean Girls, after which I start singing All You Sucka MC's in my head and stop listening to what she's saying) But anyway, this week we watched a film called Harold & Maude and it was pretty sweet. Maybe you have already seen this one, but I wanted to share this information with you in case you hadn't.

Here is the plot outline from IMDB:

Harold is a depressed, death-obsessed 20-year-old man-child who spends his free time attending funerals and committing suicide in front of his mother, but he does not die. At a funeral, Harold befriends Maude, a 79-year-old woman who has a zest for life. She and Harold spend much time together during which she exposes him to the wonders and possibilities of life. After rejecting his mother's three attempts to set him up with a potential wife, and committing fake suicide in front of all of them, Harold announces that he is to be married to Maude. However, Maude has a surprise for Harold that is to change his life forever.

I realize this movie sounds a little morbid and freaky, but it's hilarious. It's kind of a dark humor type of film, but it's really funny if you don't take it too seriously. If you can find it I suggest you check it out.

Enjoy.

Cause we are living in a material world

Today I went and saw Material Girls. Mostly because I miss seeing these cheesy fluff movies with my readership, but also because I love Hillary Duff and what could be better than double Duff? Ok, a lot of things, but when your dad is out of town and your mom is at work and you have a huge gaping hole in your mouth you need to pass the time somehow. I was surprised by how much Haylie Duff stole the show actually. She was pretty good. And is she older or younger than Hillary? Because in the movie she plays the older sister.

Anyway, it made me laugh and even tear up a tiny bit at one point so when it comes to the dollar theatre give it a whirl.

Treasure in the Workplace

In a meeting at work today my boss quoted National Treasure, the part where Ben Gates is talking about Thomas Edison...."I didn't fail, I found 2,000 ways how not to make a light bulb; I only need to find one way to make it work."

It was amazing.
Jenny, that was for you.

"about to get taken to a dream world of magic"

Happy late Easter everyone. Hope everyone's day was filled with chocolate bunnies and marshmallow peeps.

I spent a lot of the day cleaning and then went for a sweet bike ride with Jackie. We encountered a little problem when the trail ended, but we pulled through. I enjoy going in bike rides on trails, however I do not like going under those bridges with the tiny dark tunnels. Having to yell "coming down" as you’re heading into a dark wet slippery tunnel is not too fun if you ask me. Every time I do it I think of Erin Reading and how she ended up in a body cast when she went for a bike ride down one of those in Plano and slipped on the rising water. Perhaps I should explore another trail to prevent this.

Later I ate some grub with the Cumming's twins. I gotta say those two are pretty funny. They take me back to the days of high school when we would do stupid things like steal construction signs and place them in front yards. Or when we took the Jack antenna ball from someone (have no idea who that was anymore) and turned it into a flower before returning it to the pimped out man truck it was attached to. Good times.

Jackie and I also got our Narnia on last night. That movie is freaking amazing! The only thing that would have made it better was a couple cup cakes, some Mr. Pibb and a tub of red vines. Everyone should revisit that one and soon. Hope everyone's Easter was as kick-a as mine.

Is it just me or does it look like this rabbit is giving a "Heil Hitler"?

Jordan plays ball. Charlie Manson kills people. I talk.

Thank YOU for Smoking! Good hell this was a good movie. It has been a long time since I have laughed that hard and that often in a movie. I tried really hard to make a mental note of this amazing line at the beginning of the movie, but my brain couldn't hold on to it what with all the other amazing lines that were being thrown at me.

If this movie ever manages to achieve wide release in this state (a hard thing to do) I will go with each and every one of you. Here are a couple more choice lines from the movie. Let me just tell you this is only the beginning. Enjoy.

Joey Naylor: Dad, why is the American government the best government?
Nick Naylor: Because of our endless appeals system.

Nick Naylor: You know the guy who can get any girl he wants? I'm that guy, on crack.

Thank You For Smoking

I feel pressure to blog daily...mostly this pressure is placed on myself, by myself. However, today I have nothing to say. I do have a particularly long story involving The Letterbox, my local postal place which has decided to screw me over twice, however that story is too long to explain in this blog without getting a complaint from Jenny about it being too long or other people saying I am complaining or being annoying. That was a horribly long sentence, but oh well. Tonight I am going to see Thank You for Smoking, here's a little teaser:

Jeff Megall: Sony has a futuristic sci-fi movie they're looking to make.
Nick Naylor: Cigarettes in space?
Jeff Megall: It's the final frontier, Nick.
Nick Naylor: But wouldn't they blow up in an all oxygen environment?
Jeff Megall: Probably. But it's an easy fix. One line of dialogue. 'Thank God we invented the... ' you know, whatever device.

I'll give a full report tomorrow.

LIAR LIAR PANTS ON FIRE

Forgive me readership for I have sinned. It has been 24 years since my last confessional. While many sins have been committed in those few years that I should be confessing I have one looming sin that needs to be purged. Last night I committed a sin against my readership, namely Jenny, Kristin, and Adam.

After being cordially invited to dine with them I purgered myself by saying I was attending a movie with someone who was innocently dragged into my web of lies. I was not in fact seeing a movie with that person I was seeing an amazing film involving cross-dressing, coming out (in society) and soccer...I think you know what I'm talking about. I went to that movie with Michon, not she who must not be named. Don't know why I lied, such frivolity must have rubbed off from someone else. But I couldn't come over and enjoy ANTM and Lost without getting that off my jugs. I'm sorry, I lied, don't hate me.

"Two Gay Dogs"....this film was actually made in 1912

Ok, before I even start this blog entry I would like to acknowledge the fact that on February 10th I included this in a post entitled Filliam H. Muffman, "Lastly, I am considering getting a dog who I plan to name "Le Foo" or "Faiasl" what does everyone think of this dog?"......I still love dogs.

As Annalise would say....The following entry and I would like to apologize in advance to all of my readers who happen to be fans of any of the following films (I use the word film loosely). All of the views and comments expressed within this blog are strictly my own and not the opinions of www.blogger.com (although they should be), it's parent company, Google, or it's affiliates.

Khaki, Annalise and I were discussing the movie slump that this nation is in due to Oscar fever already setting in. Subsequently we have all become subject to such crap movies as Date Movie, World's Fastest Indian, Curious George, The Pink Panther and Eight Below.

This led us to a discussion about the need to end the filming of any movies about dogs....namely movies when a dog or several dogs are the main characters. Wonder how Paul Walker felt at the premier of Eight Below when he was listed under a pack of dog "actors" in the credits. Couldn't have felt good.

I was trying to think of some dog movies and the more I thought the more movies I was able to come up with....here are a few of them.

1. Shaggy Dog-like the old b/w version, but Tim Allen, come on

2. All Dogs Go to Heaven...not bad, but also not too good.

3. Old Yeller...never seen it, but seems pretty crappy.

4. Eight Below...enough said.

5. Snow Dogs...another movie about dog sledding....really?

6. Beethoven,…I must admit some choice lines, but still no good.

7. Air Bud...crap!

8. Homeward Bound....how many times are they gonna make this movie?

9. White Fang....more dog sledding.

10. My Dog Skip...never saw it, not gonna.

So to sum up, if you are going to make a movie about dogs there are three options:

1. Lost dogs

2. Dog sledding

3. Dogs of children who don't have friends and will later loose those dogs....good thing they don't make sequels to those ones.

Peace.

Today Is My Independence Afternoon

As many of you know today is the big day.....jacks day. Today we find out if my rigorous training schedule will usher me into victory, or throw me back into the dumpster as usual.

I would like to thank my trainers and supporters for the incredible job they have done.

Mom-thanks for providing the genius idea

Kristin-thanks for cheering me on and giving me toss advice. And most importantly thank you for saving my glowing bouncy ball from the cup incident.

Jenny-thanks for providing training tunes to keep me going when times got rough

Jackie-thanks for challenging me and pushing me to pick up more jacks

Now I would like to offer up a inspirational speech that I will be reciting to myself throughout the day.

"My readership, today, my fellow Friday Challengers will know humiliation. This afternoon they will know ridicule. This afternoon is the afternoon I fight back. This afternoon is my independence afternoon."

If anyone can tell me where that speech was derived from I will buy you and orange roll from PB...Annalise, you better get this.

Here's to the glowing bouncy ball and the jacks!

"I love treasure movies"

This is how last night went down:

Jenny: "I love treasure movies, Goonies, Indiana Jones, National Treasure."
Kristi: "What?"

........moments later

Jenny: "I love treasure movies."
Kristi: "What? I'm sorry."

Man, I need to start listening to Jenny or stop watching National Treasure. I so swear. So glad I know where that is from now. Much more meaningful.

In honor of the movie I thought I would highlight a few things I think are "National Treasures."

1. Mario Kart Double Dash....this will be my demise.

2. Diet Coke. If squirrels and puppies are addicted I'm pretty sure I don't have a shot in hell of givin' this stuff up.


3. Jon Voight aka "The Voight"
May I just mention that when I googled him in google images a picture of the Pope came up. Coincidence......I think not. He is defintly one of those men that got less weird looking with age.

4. Neil Diamond. Can't you just hear him bringin' home the last chorus of Sweet Caroline? I know I can. Thanks Neil.


5. Scrabble. And I quote: "Is plode a word?"
"I know you can explode....I know you can implode.....but can you ever just plode?"
Priceless.

Peace, love and 24.

ps. Jenny do you know this woman? If not I think you should run against her for Position #2. It sounds like a prime position to start your quest for world Jenny-nation. Your slogan could be "Ditch the I Vote for Y....suckas." I would be glad to be your campaign manager. Think about it.

Bloggin' bloggin' good for the noggin'

In the words of Brad Gluckman aka B-Rad of Malubu's Most Wanted:

I got sumtin' to say, and I need the world to hear it. I'm a lyricologist. I can rap about anything. Shrink, shrink. Blinkity-blink. Tried to make me think. Wanna go to my sink. And vomit. Clean it up wit' Comet. Earth is my planet. See? I'm the shiznit.

Traffic, traffic lookin' fo my chapstick, feelin' kinda car sick, there's a Ford Maverick.

That one is my particular favorite.

Dane came across the sweet picture I have featured today while he was looking for images of dollar signs. Sweet huh! He sent it over and it inspired my blog, plus I had to share it with the world.

Anyway, sorry for the lapse in blogging, plus this is my shortest entry to date, but time is money! And the dude in that picture should know.

Peace my crackas.

Here We Blog One More Time.........everybody's feelin' fine

In honor of the new movie I purchased last night I would like to introduce you all to a little character named Owen Wilson....Jenny, I believe you're familiar.

Let me set this up just in case none of you saw Wedding Crashers (which I'm sure is all of you...since it received a "R" rating). Pretty sure you can figure out the premise of the movie from the title, but basically they crash weddings and whoo women and the families of the weddings they're crashing with their personalities. So anyway they have to make up jobs and names while they're there and Jeremy (Vince Vaughn) wants to mix it up and this is what John (Owen Wilson) has to say:

John Beckwith: I'd like to be cowboys from Texas or pimps from Oakland but it's not Halloween. Grow up; Peter Pan, Count Chocula.

One more then I'm done. Love this quote, especially the "ass-out hug" part. Enjoy.

Janice (Vince Vaughn's secretary): I've got the perfect girl for you!
Jeremy Grey (Vince Vaughn): [sigh] Janice, I apologize to you if I don't seem real eager to jump into a forced awkward intimate situation that people like to call dating. I don't like the feeling. You're sitting there, you're wondering do I have food on my face, am I eating, am I talking too much, are they talking enough, am I interested I'm not really interested, should I play like I'm interested but I'm not that interested but I think she might be interested but do I want to be interested but now she's not interested? So all of the sudden I'm getting, I'm starting to get interested... And when am I supposed to kiss her? Do I have to wait for the door cause then it's awkward, it's like well goodnight. Do you do like that ass-out hug? Where you like, you hug each other like this and your ass sticks out cause you're trying not to get too close or do you just go right in and kiss them on the lips or don't kiss them at all? It's very difficult trying to read the situation. And all the while you're just really wondering are we gonna get hopped up enough to make some bad decisions? Perhaps play a little game called "just the tip". Just for a second, just to see how it feels. Or, ouch, ouch you're on my hair.
Janice: Okay...
Jeremy Grey: OK, can you, can you put that so he can't see it? Thank you. Hey, Janice... great talk.

Man is that a great quote. Ok, I'm done now. Can't wait for you guys to come back! See you soon.

I dare say these are the best boiled potatoes I have ever had.

Mr. Darcy: You must know... surely, you must know it was all for you. You are too generous to travel with me. I believe you spoke with my aunt last night, and it has taught me to hope as I'd scarcely allowed myself before. If your feelings are still what they were last April, tell me so at once. My affections and wishes have not changed, but one word from you will silence me forever. If, however, your feelings have changed, I will have to tell you: you have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love... I love... I love you. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on.

Ms. Westberg: H yes! I'll be Mrs. MacFadyen anyday.

Because it's the first day of 2006 I thought I would take some time to reflect on a few amusing things that have happened in the last year. Here it goes:

1. When Jack Bauer went rogue.
2. When Annalise and I were eating pizza on our front porch in London and this lady went postal on us and sent our dinner flying in the air.
3. When Jenny and Michon revealed the true name of “Girl Jeans”
4. When I found out that his real name is Seve McGooglebie
5. When Kristin called me in London, I loved that day.
6. The “Spiderman” episode of the OC
7. Jenny’s soccer themed birthday party…..was that 2005? Not sure.
8. When we all became obsessed with Lost.
9. Ashley’s wedding
10. When Michon and I provided warm up music for your soccer games…..amazing picks Michon.
11. When Annalise told the guy at Pizza Hut her name was Pepperoni. (is it just me, or do lots of things go wrong when Annalise and I eat pizza)
12. When I got my job in Provo and got to move back up near all you cool cats.
13. When Ashley and I actually graduated. (props to Ash for doing it on time)
14. When I fell down the stairs on Tower Bridge.
15. When Jackie called me to make plans to see a movie a month in advance, man that girl’s funny.
16. When Kristin and I opened up the Brotha / Cracka sweatshop.
17. When Bridget and I took sewing together and pretty much messed up everything we made.
18. When Adam played host to Katy and I and I spilled his precious French vanilla hot cocoa on myself and Katy.
19. When Andy dressed up as Jenny for Halloween.
20. When I discovered the art of blogging and started the revolution.

So there's a little recap of some amusing things from this year. Most of those are pretty recent, which proves that my memory is crap, but fun none the less.

Jolly Bunch of A**holes

First of all let me send a shout out to my peeps, Jenny and Adam for leaving some sweet comments about my first entry. May I just say that this blog is intended to spark witty banter between myself and all of my friends, so let the game begin. I wrote an awesome entry earlier today and then to my dismay it was deleted, so I apologize if this isn't up to par, but it is round two.

I was thinking about Christmas this morning and came across this quote that I think we should all ponder...."The only blind person at Christmastime is he who has not Christmas in his heart." ~ Helen Keller

Or in the immortal words of Clark Griswald, "Where do you think you're going? Nobody's leaving. Nobody's walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas. No, no. We're all in this together. This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here. We're gonna press on, and we're gonna have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny f-ing Kaye. And when Santa squeezes his fat white ass down that chimney tonight, he's gonna find the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse."

Man I love that quote. I tried my best to remove the French expletives, however I firmly believe this quote would be "moo" without the words "ass" and "asshole."

Any-who, moving on. I have been telling some of you (Kristin) about some entertaining videos that my fellow slacker co-workers sent to me. Let the laughs begin.

This one is a Matrix Ping-Pong match:
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-8079411349144989883

And this one is an AMAZING Gap commercial, your welcome.
http://jason.heiser.org/video/jonze.mov

Peace out friends.