I REALLY need a haircut!

So when Jackie tells you you need a haircut....you know it's necessary. Don't worry Jackie I'm not even a little bit offended, facts are facts. So I've been doing a little bit of a search for what I want and here's a couple haircuts I like so far....what do you think?

So with this one it's hard to actually see what the haircut looks like, but I like the style. And I like that she could probably put all of her hair back in a ponytail (a major must for me).

Yes, this is a picture of Heidi on tv, I took a picture of her paused on my tv to get this one. I really like this cut, but some of the front layers are really short...would require bobby pins when ponytailing.....not desirable.


This looks cute (obviously ignore the color as I will never have pink tips) but that aside it's a basic long bob, can't go wrong.....right?

Now imagine these hairstyles around a fatter, less perfect face and you will get me....any opinions?

Best Christmas Present EVER!

So when Jackie and I took our awesome road trip from Philly to Utah I was given the assignment of getting the first of many rounds of snacks. At a random gas station in Jersey I found these....aka the best pretzels ever and object of my obsession ever since. We're talking anytime I went into a random gas station, grocery store, I would do a quick scan on the snack aisle just in case they had somehow by some miracle landed on the shelf.

Several months ago I went so far as to visit the Frito Lay web site to do some serious research on where I could get these babies. Turned out there were none within a 50 mile radius of my parents house.

No go forward several months and get Jackie on the case. She called the manufacturer, found out they were only sold east of the Mississippi river. Nope that didn't stop her, then she found a store in Jersey that sold them, then she called the store and had them set aside 10 bags! They were then picked up by her friend and mailed to Jackie who then wrapped the case of pretzels and gave them to me last night for Christmas!!!!!! Seriously! BEST GIFT EVER! To anyone who was planning on getting me something for Christmas, consider your gift topped.....but I will still accept them :)

Boggle

So I downloaded Boggle on my iPhone yesterday....best $1.99 I've spent in a long time! I'm totally hooked.

Turkey Heads!

Frisco Frosty

Well today Jackie, Jenny and I did the Frisco Frosty 5K. Jenny kicked some serious butt and Jackie and I managed to finish in respectable times. It was a good race and the perfect way to start a day that included a cookie exchange....less guilt that way.

Cookie Mania

This morning I baked 8 dozen cookies for my sisters cookie exchange this weekend. She is really serious about this....as in she told a lady from last year that if she brought "break and bake" cookies again this year she couldn't partake in the exchange. Seriously! So funny!

iBlog

So I downloaded a blogger app on my phone because these days I seem to hardly bother with turning my computer on. We'll see if this increases my blogging...maybe it will maybe it won't. I figure it's worth a try.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Tonight my sister very kindly made me my very own belated birthday dinner. Yummy pot roast with potatoes, carrots, and mushrooms! It was really good. The best part of the dinner was probably when my niece turned to me and said, "Kristi, are you 32?"

NO! 28! 28! Don't deprive me of my last 2 years as a 20-something!

That was followed by Coca-Cola cake....problem solved :)

Million Dollar Ribbon

So today Jackie and I went into Michael's with two things in mind. Jackie wanted ribbon and I was going to buy a tube of paint....both purchases were going to be made with our 40% off coupons. Some how we walked out of there signed up for a cake decorating class, I had no paint, and Jackie bought the worlds most expensive ribbon at $5.75 a yard....no joke. In her defense she did not know the price and we were so distracted that when she made the purchase we didn't realize how ridiculous this ribbon was. Anyway, we are both excited about the cake decorating....maybe now I will have something to blog about!

Confession

Today I yelled at the UK Visa lady....pretty sure that is going to be denied now.

Dear Butterfinger,

I'm sorry it's been so long. Your are an excellent candy bar.

Love,
Kristi

For Jenny

There are a lot of things at Macy's that amuse me....people lying about their size....blatantly, people walking around with strollers with dogs in them rather than small people, but nothing awakens the 13 year old in me more than when a customer asks me this question:

"Can you check me out?"

I know, clearly I need to grow up, but whenever someone asks me that I just want to step back, look them up and down and say, "yeah, you look ok....now how about you pay for that stuff."

String

My bookbinding teacher has lots of fantastic sayings, one of them being "how long is a piece of string". I've been having a string of bad luck....I'm hoping my piece is coming to an end. Last week I was driving to the Amon Carter and my car stopped running on the highway. Thankfully a highway worker guy was right there and used his truck to push my car to the next exit. Almost $2000 later it runs again.

Then on Saturday morning I woke up with a bunch of goop in my left eye.....pink eye. So I got ready for work and headed to a nearby clinic where they charged me $250 to tell me what I already knew. So far this is all that's happened.....hopefully the string is coming to an end.

Think the picture is big enough?

So some of you may know I have a thing for William Shatner.....who I like to refer to as "The Shat".....no I don't think he's hot or anything, I just find him entertaining.

I turned the TV to Boston Legal this evening and once again was entertained by the man. I mean this show had some quality actors, James Spader, The Shat, Candice Bergen....good stuff. Why I never watched it while it was running originally I will never know, but I gotta say I was thoroughly entertained with the three episodes I watched tonight.

The highlight had to be a line The Shat (Denny Crane) said while working on a case regarding the teaching of creationism in school...he was on the pro side.

Denny Crane: You hear the one about the fella who died, went to the pearly gates? St. Peter let him in. Sees a guy in a suit making a closing argument. Says, "Who's that?" St. Peter says, "Oh, that's God. Thinks he's Denny Crane."

I love that he is so self absorbed, it's hilarious. Anyway I have no real purpose behind this post other than to reiterate my love of Mr. Shatner and possibly to get you to watch an episode or two should you come across one.

I tagged myself

So nobody tagged me....to my knowledge, but I love lists so naturally I participated.

Things I'm looking forward to:
1. Jill and Alex coming on Thursday
2. Seeing the new Harry Potter
3. Finding my real job
4. Going to pilates
5. Dog-sitting Ho-ho and Maxi-pie
6. Going to Northern Ireland for a month
7. Jackie coming to Texas
8. Other fun stuff

Things I did this weekend:
1. Worked
2. Went to dinner with my parents
3. Worked
4. Checked my email several times
5. Worked
6. Workout
7. Slept in a little
8. Worked

Things I wish I could do:
1. Have my own conservation studio
2. Become a real runner
3. Be really skinny
4. Own a dog
5. Be really good at budgeting and saving money for the future
6. Hang out with my friends more
7. Have a real life
8. Sleep in every day....that one was Annalise's but ditto.

Shows that I watch:
I don't watch anything religiously anymore, just a lot of HGTV shows

Places I'd like to travel:
1. Easter Island
2. Hungry
3. Iceland
4. Greece
5. Hawaii
6. Boston
7. Panama
8. Anywhere I can see the Northern Lights

Not in the cards

Well ever since I went to my first pilates class I have wanted to go back...one month later I still haven't made it. My work schedule seems to foul this up every week....except this week. So I go to the gym after work excited for my second pilates class only to find out that on the first Tuesday of every month they do not have pilates, instead they have a "taster class" where the aerobics director does a little step, a little kickbox cardio and a little Latin flava dance non-sweat-producing thing. Since I was already there I decided to stay and do the class, which turned out to be very entertaining. Two men showed up and it seemed like no matter how many times we repeated a move they were always behind, going the opposite direction or just standing there in confusion. I imagine this is the kind of entertainment people had the pleasure of enjoying at my first step class....hate to admit it but it was pretty fun to watch them. Maybe I'll get to go to pilates next week :)

I need a translator

I recently decided to go to my first Step Aerobics class at LA Fitness. I'm in pretty good shape, I used to take dance so I'm somewhat good at picking things like that up....so I thought. Apparently you need a translator to attend this class. See how everyone in the picture is in sync....add one Kristi and that picture is ruined.

Things I didn't know about step aerobics:
1. People who take step are dedicated, they come EVERY time and they know EVERY move....as in they look awesome and Kristi is facing the wrong direction while tripping over the step thingy.
2. You NEED to know the lingo.....phrases like "repeater three" and "corner corner knees" should be a part of your day to day speech......when you don't know what these things mean it causes you to decide to just step up on the bench and back off while the people around you are doing cool stuff.
3. It causes you to sweat....a LOT. As in I was embarrassed to go from the aerobics room to the main gym area because people would see the huge sweat ring on my chest.

All that said it was a really good workout, and I did return for a second session which went a little better than the first.

Something to entertain you at work

My sister showed me this link today and I found it highly amusing. It's a message board called FMyLife where people can post funny things that have happened to them recently. Sad, but I did get a lot of enjoyment out of the misery of others.

Big News!

I bought a ticket to fly to Northern Ireland to volunteer for the month of August! Yipeeeee!

My future personal ad

I recently received a very nice "Tell Us What You Think" message from a customer I helped last week. Basically when you finish a sale you are supposed to write your name on the receipt and ask them to visit our website to rate your service. This was my first one, and to tell you the truth it made me feel pretty good.....that was until I saw the "description" line where the customer is asked to describe the associate. The following is going to be used in my personal ad should I ever post one:

Description: Heavy-set (ouch!), long, straight hair (am I long or is my hair?), dirty blond (when I hear that all I can think is dirty), fair (true), clear complexion (the one part I consider to be complimentary)

So there you have it, Kristi in a nut shell. I'm sure the prospects will be lining up based on that description.

Something's Missing

As most of you know I often go to the gym before work. This means I have to shower at the gym, which is not too bad really. The only bad thing is my memory....as evident by my forgetting socks and on one occasion shoes to wear to work. Last week I did it again, only this time it was not a clothing issue. Instead I forgot to bring a towel....and I realized this after my workout. It is this reason that caused me to casually go up to nearly every paper towel dispenser in LA Fitness so I could slowly and secretly load up on paper towels so I could dry off after my shower. I did manage to pack in enough to get myself sorted out, however all I could think about is how the "Naked Asian Lady" does the same thing, because for some reason she does not even bother to bring a towel to the gym....ever.

A Slight Obsession

Ever since my road trip with Jackie I have been on a search for these pretzels we bought at some random gas station in New Jersey. I've checked Target, Walmart, Tom Thumb, and EVERY gas station I actually go into. These things can NOT be found. So, if by chance you come across a bag of Rold Gold Pretzel Waves with Vanilla Yogurt Drizzle, buy a package for yourself.....and a second one for me. Although lets be honest, I'm not gonna see that bag because they are so good you will most likely eat both bags yourself.

A Situation

So today I was sitting watching You've Got Mail when I heard a sound I thought was leaking water. I walked around the house looking for a puddle somewhere and found nothing, so I went back to watching the movie. About 30 minutes later I heard this sound again.....this led me to believe I was not as crazy as I was thinking I was. I start walking around the house again looking for the source of the noise when I see something moving on the floor out of the corner of my eye.

It was a bird! In the house! On the floor! AND I was home alone!

Those of you who know me know I HATE BIRDS! Needless to say this freaked me out, but at the same time I felt sorry for the bird. My first reaction was to text Catherine, she tried to convince me that I could help the bird by putting it in a box until my dad got home. I didn't like that idea as it involved me touching the bird, so I called Jackie....she did not answer her phone! I left her a message briefing her on my situation with strict instructions to call me back.

I couldn't sit in the house knowing the bird was in the next room so I found a box, a pair of my mom's gardening gloves and sat down in front of the TV to psych myself up for the challenge. 10 minutes later I walked over to help the bird.....I use the word help loosely in this case. With box ready in hand I reached down for the bird, but it started flapping around and got one birdie foot latched onto the side of my box. I tried to set the box down, but that meant putting the box on its tail feathers....this was no good. After 20 seconds or so the bird perched on the side of the box. By this point I was so traumatized I set the box down and let the bird be. I also decided I did not really want to be in the house with the bird so I proceeded outside to wash my car until my parents came home. 20 minutes later I walked back in and peeked around the corner to find the bird was no longer on the box! It had found a new perch on the toy chest.

When my parents came home my dad calmly walked over to the bird, cupped his hands around it, walked outside and let it fly away. If only I had inherited those genes.

Monster Craving

I recently watched an episode of a show called Unwrapped on the food network. Basically they show you how certain types of foods are made, well this particular episode was all about ice cream. The segment included an in depth analysis of the Dairy Queen Blizzard: how it's made, how the new flavors are invented, the testing process to make sure it can withstand the up-side-down test. Ever since this show all I can think about is Blizzards! Chocolate ones, Oreo ones, Reeces Peanut Butter cup ones, you name it I have thought about it. I thought the only way to rectify this was to go out and get one, so I did. THIS WAS A BAD IDEA! Now that I have the very recent memory of just how truly good these things are I want them all the time! No bueno!

Wish List

Lately I've been thinking about some of the things I want in my house.....once I have one that is. So far this is what I've got.

Striped carpet on my stairs, not necessarily this particular color, but you get the idea.

A closet like this....but with a better shoe rack.

A garden like this....ok maybe not quite as grand but one that is wild yet organized.

Some white roses....more specifically "Iceberg Roses" they climb and smell REALLY good.

And of course one of these :)

Kharma

So during the last week I started feeling more detached from people than usual....this led to my decision to use Facebook a little bit more than none, which is about how often I use it now. What did this get me? An opportunity to change EVERY password, all because I was dumb enough to fall for the fake Facebook sign in page that looked exactly like the real Facebook. Will I make Facebook a bigger part of my life.....seems like a bad idea as of right now.

People Suck.....put that on a pillow

Ok, today a lady was carting around a butt load of clothes to take into the dressing room. I walked past her and she told me flat out that she was going to make a mess out of the dressing room. As in she was planning on trashing the place so I could go clean up her royal mess. She then put a ridiculous number of items on hold, pushed in front of another customer when she returned for her clothes, spilled cinnamon and sugar all over my check out area and then got mad at me for brushing away her detritus before laying her clothes down. SERIOUSLY! This is not an uncommon occurrence. It's events like these that have spawned my new life saying, "people suck" (said in a sarcastically happy sing song sort of way.....if you want the full effect).

Now Open!

I opened up my own conservation studio today! By opened I really mean that I moved my conservation tools out of my closet and into my sister Jill's bedroom where my desk is. I also pilfered an elephant lamp from my dad's office and set up my iPod speakers. I started working on a photo album my grandma gave me about a year ago, it's one VERY small step, but it felt good.

Why? Part II

So the braless wonder has struck again. I was at the gym the other day, in the women's locker room sitting on a bench taking off my shoes when I notice out of the corner of my eye someone walking towards me. Yep, it was her.....naked......with nothing but her t-shirt wadded up in front of her who-ha. Needless to say I was traumatized.

Why?

There is this lady at the gym who works out a'natural....as in she does things like using the stationary rower or the treadmill without wearing a bra. She's probably around 50ish, so lets be honest those babies are not exactly perky. In fact as she was power walking in front of me today the song "do your ears hang low" kept running through my head. Why on earth would someone do that?! I am baffled.

Is this a joke?

This email was in my inbox today. INBOX as in my email didn't think this baby was junk. Seriously? Who sent this to me? Not cool!

Irish Texan

Last week my friend Catherine came to visit me! It was a really fantastic trip filled with Texas stuff. Here's an image gallery of some of the highlights.

Our first stop....after Target was the Fort Worth Stock Yards. This is where Catherine saw her first cattle drive.....ten cattle lumbering down the street with 10 cowboys calling out, "here cattle". It was pretty funny.

Here cattle! I thought this one was a beaut.

After the cattle drive we visited an old fashioned western wear store and watched a guy steaming hats into shape. Catherine picked out this one for me....a little froo froo.
Inside the store there were tons of boots. Inside a special vault they had exotic custom made boots that were priced anywhere from $600 to $1000, here I am with a pair of ostrich skins in the boot vault.
Catherine did lots of research on San Antonio, she even received a couple emails from Mr. San Antonio himself. Here we are at the Alamo....a place I thought I had visited, but as it turns out I had been to a replica of the Alamo. I figured this out when there were no train tracks in front of the building anymore....and the real place is smaller.
From San Antonio we drove down to Padre Island and I got to drive my Cruiser on the beach!
After our trip down south we headed back to Dallas and went to The Dallas World Aquarium, this place is cool! It's basically an indoor rain forest. I got to feed this toucan 2 blueberries!

I'm trying to lure him back for the second one.

Catherine and I came across this fountain and she decided to do a little jig.

Still jigging.

We walked over to the Reunion Tower (the ball). If you haven't been here in a while it's completely renovated, very nice inside now. Sadly the restaurant was booked for the evening so we couldn't go up.
Another western shop, with some sweet signs. We had lots of fun, saw loads and had plenty of good food. It was nice to have someone to hang out with, I think I learned a lot about Texas in the 10 days Catherine was here. All in all a fantastic trip.

I am not ashamed.....at least I don't think I am....yet

So today my mom and I went to lunch and then saw a movie.....The Hannah Montana Movie. Yes my dear friends, I saw the movie about a 16 year old girl who leads a double life as both a mega pop star and a down home country girl. Several people have mentioned that I should be ashamed of this.....it also came up that maybe it would have sounded better if I had crafted some version of the story which involved me taking my niece Kate to see it....as opposed to me suggesting it and going with my mom on a Wednesday afternoon. Well, it's too late for that kind of story now, I went, I saw, I even tapped my foot along to a couple of the songs....and I might have teared up at one point. Ok, now I'm a little ashamed.

System Failure

So when I work the noon to close shift at work I leave my house 3 hours early so I can drive to the gym, workout, shower and go to work. This means I have to be organized enough to pack my work clothes and any shower stuff I need. I have become pretty good at this I have a special little bag of toiletries, I leave my towel by my gym bag, blah blah blah. Well today the system failed. I had a really good workout, a refreshing shower, put on my work clothes and then realized I forgot to pack my shoes! How I managed to forget them is beyond me, but after surveying myself in all black with my running shoes on I knew my managers would not let that fly so I headed to Target in hopes of buying some cute yet inexpensive shoes to tide me over. As usual Target came through. So I am now the proud owner of these little babies, only in black.

Confession

So as you all know I work in a mall, as in there is a food court nearby. Maybe once a week I get my lunch from Chick-fil-a where I always get the same thing. Number 5 with an 8-pack of nuggets, a large diet coke and side salad instead of fries. Every time I open up that little box of nuggets I count how many are in there.....just in case I scored the box with the extra nugget.

Mike

So a guy picked up some hours in the juniors department tonight. I got off at 6pm so I did not really get to work with him, but the few minutes I did spend with him were interesting. First of all I don't know why he picked up these hours as he is not really supposed to go in the female only dressing rooms to clean up after people.....I think parents would probably have a problem with a 45+ year old man walking in on their daughters. But, the most scary moment was right before I left when he asked me whether he would have to actually dress and undress people as part of his job......seriously, this happened. As usual this job never ceases to periodically boggle my mind.

So since returning to Texas I have focused on a limited number of things. One, working/finding a job and two, working out. I figured it was a way to get out of the house, release some stress and feel better about myself. The good news is so far so good, all those things have been/are being accomplished. I have been trying to find a realistic "body type" that I want to achieve, I mean in a perfect world I would like to resemble Jennifer Aniston (especially the hair part), Anne Hathaway or maybe even Kristin Heigl....I realize those are two very different looking people. BUT, in an effort to reach my goals I have chosen a less lofty ideal body type, but one that I feel is achievable and not too shabby. This one is coming from left field, but here it goes.........and the winner is!
I know, a strange pick, but let's face it the Hudson is fit yet curvaceous, not a bad combo. Anyway, I know this is a very conceited blog, but hey, at least I blogged. :)

Candid Camera

Jackie emailed me this picture the other day.....she uses it to cheer herself up from time to time....maybe it can provide the same service to you. Be sure to click and enlarge it to see it in all its glory :)

Kid knees

Today I was telling my niece about a friend of mine who likes to eat things that I would classify under the category: gross...never gonna happen. He likes things like cows tongue, liver, something called "bloater" (no idea what that is) and kidneys. When I mentioned kidney Kate looked at me in horror and said "people eat that?". I told her yes and she looked at me then grabbed her knees.....she thought I meant "kid knees" as in Stephen snatches little kids so he can eat their knees for dinner. Great stuff.

You've got mail!

My new shiny passport arrived in the mail today! Needless to say I was very excited, but also concerned. The new ones don't have your picture on the front cover it's on the first page....making it very easy to rip out the most important page. Secondly they did not send back my old passport! The one with all the cool stamps from the Czech Republic, Norway, France, England and all the other places I've visited! It's like my whole travel history has been taken away and now I'm left with this boring empty passport......with a better picture of me and some new chip embedded in it. I guess I'll just have to fill it up all over again.....pity. :)

It's like porn.....for those with OCD

It's my day off today and I was trying to decide what to do. The list for today included mail something to Jill, drop off my dad's shirts to the dry cleaners, look for more black clothing....Macy's uniform, workout and visit the new HUGE Container Store. To prep for my visit I even went to the website to look at pretty pictures of organized spaces....I know I'm a sad sad girl. Long story short I did all of the things on the list EXCEPT visit organizational heaven. Am I the only one who gets excited by these images? Someone please validate me so I feel a little less like a freak.....I'm totally going there on my next day off.

To quote Rachel, "It's so pretty!"

Who needs food when your pantry is that perfect.

Someday....sigh.

Macy's Moment

I had the following conversation with someone at work today:

Jane: Kristi, you have really beautiful eyes.
Kristi: Thanks
Jane: You should wear makeup to highlight them more
Kristi:.....I am wearing makeup

Here's Hopin'

Well today I have a phone interview with the Intermuseum Conservation Association (ICA). Send out some good vibes.....and pray this interview has no resemblance of my last interview.

I had a customer today names Chastity......isn't that just setting the girl up for failure?

50?!

So I was perusing my parents most recent copy of AARP magazine....which had Dustin Hoffman on the cover when I came across a list of people who are turning 50 this month. I had to do a double take because much to my surprise Flavor Flav was on that list. Seriously.....this dude is about to be 50? Was I the only one who thought he was like 35? What very little respect I had for him was quickly lost once this information was acquired.

One small step

I sent my passport off yesterday for renewal. It expired this month and it suddenly dawned on me that if I wanted to leave the country in a hurry the boarder patrol, customs, and the airline attendants would squash that idea real quick. So off I sent it for a mere $75 I will get my new little book to fill with stamps all over again!

$1

I purchased this hat at Target yesterday for ONE DOLLAR! It's times like these that I love America. To celebrate my fantastic St. Patrick's Day find I decided to call my Irish friend Catherine and have a video conversation with the hat on. I mean how funny would it be to turn on the video and see that on the other end? I found this hilarious...she had no idea what this hat was supposed to be. Either way I laughed about it all day.

Frightening yet hilarious

Today I watched as a 40 something year old lady tried on a pair of purple snake skin patterned leggings.....just the leggings, as in she thought they were pants.

Wrong side of the bed

I was under the impression that I have SOME ability to hide my true feelings when it comes to working at Macy's. Today however that idea was proven incorrect. The following is a list of signals that may have tipped off my co-workers that I was in a bad mood:

1. My refusal to participate in the morning rally where we were supposed to dance the electric slide to get pumped up to sell sell sell......at 8:45 Kristi does no dancing.
2. My lack of friendliness towards several people as I collected the trash cans that are stationed at my rap stand.
3. My decision to re-size the sale rack again in order to prevent myself from having to talk to people.
4. My lack of the use of the word "outstanding". (sarcastic usage excluded)

As it turns out people pick up on these things.....outstanding.

The Line

Well as some of you know I had the pleasure (no I'm not being sarcastic....seriously, I'm not) of driving with Jackie from Philadelphia, PA all the way to Lehi, UT. In case you don't realize it, that's a really long way. This fact was realized when I opened up the map of the USA with our route highlighted.....ONE-----VERY-----LONG-----LINE. In my head I knew this was a long way, however when you look at how far it is on a map, rather than the tiny version in my head you realize how long it truly is.

Our first night of driving Jackie pulled out this map and the flashlight she had stowed in the glove box and began looking at the line. She looked, and looked and looked and looked until I finally asked her how that line was looking. Well, that started a running joke about the line that continued even after we arrived and I was back in Texas. The trip was filled with lots of memorable moments, including me thinking Sapp Brothers was a pancake house....it is in fact a place to get your car fixed, me belting out the best of Garth Brooks when I got my "second wind"....so sorry Jackie, Jackie coming in early during nearly every song she sang, and the two of us periodically loosing our minds. Needless to say it was a very entertaining road trip, one I will never forget....and hopefully never make again. Fingers crossed....keep that line away from me.

Underpants

I was telling Jackie about how I once went to see Michael Flatley Lord of the Dance and just as the show was starting a woman rushed the stage and threw her underwear at him....seriously, it happened.

This conversation prompted discussion on what music stars we would be willing to give such treatment.

My answer: Bono, Chris Martin

Jackie's answer: Josh Groban

It was awesome, and hilarious.

Sometimes I get excited about very small things. Take for instance my new tube of mascara....you forget how crappy your mascara is until you get a new perfect one.

What happens when your phone is smarter than you

So for Christmas Santa brought me a new cell phone. Allowing me to go from a phone something like this....old man not included.

To this little baby.
Needless to say it was a big jump in technology. I mean this thing knows where I am at all times, tells me the weather, keeps my calendar (and boy is it jam packed), allows me to listen to soothing sounds as I go to sleep, calculate tips, find restaurants, gives me a workout program, you name it this thing can do it. It's freaking amazing.

Now the tricky part is what happens when your phone is smarter than you. As of a day and a half ago my phone was not ringing or making any sounds...not even the keyboard clicks. I downloaded the new software, reprogrammed all my settings, blah blah blah. I tried everything. So as a last resort I took it into the ATT store. As I'm waiting there this helper guy asks why I'm there and I tell him about how my phone is not making any sounds. I hand him the phone, he moves the "silent mode" switch on the side and voila it's fixed!....and Kristi is the dumbest iPhone owner out there.

A pointless post

Well I'd like to say that I have exciting news or that something truly entertaining has happened in my life, but that would be a lie. I do however have an overwhelming urge to write a post. Like I said nothing has happened, no forts built or the like, I did however work a lot this week which is a good thing.

I also attended my first aerobics class at LA Fitness (the big winner in my free trial marathon). Cardio Kickboxing was the only class that I could fit into my work schedule so that's how I chose it. I gotta say it kicked my butt but was pretty fun. We'll see how I feel tomorrow, hopefully not as sore as the last time I worked out with Will (the trainer guy) who took away my ability to walk and caused me to consider throwing myself down the stairs in the Stonebriar mall rather than endure the pain of walking down them.

Indicators that your job interview is not going well

1. You are told about the company three times by three different people individually.

2. The other designer reminds you of Jose Eber but with greasy Euro hair in your face type hair-do

(for those of you not familiar this is Jose)

3. You show your portfolio and the interviewer's reply is, "this is it?"
4. You are asked to design something right on the spot, given no indication of what should be put on this card aside from a logo....for Nikon.
5. After being left in the office for 10 minutes Jose comes back in the room and is surprised that all you have so far is the Nikon logo on a yellow background with a made-up phone number
6. And the kicker, you are left in the waiting area for someone to return when the first interviewer walks by and asks why you are standing there.....because the interview is over, but you received no handshake or thank you for coming....or any indication that the interview was in fact finished.

And that in a nut shell is what I can now call the worst job interview I have ever been a part of.

How many posts can I devote to the neti pot?

At least one more. So as promised I purchased my neti pot today, after the worlds worst job interview, more to come on that. I did in fact find this little beauty at Target, it was actually the last one.....this thing must be catching on. Anyway, after much apprehension today I tried it before going to bed and was pleasantly surprised. My nasal passages are clear, my sinuses warmed and soothed and most importantly I can breath through BOTH nostrils at once. It's a little amazing this little pot. Ok, no more neti pot posts....I promise.

All Hail Target!

I'm pretty sure everyone knows how much I LOVE Target. I mean I applied to work for them in India! India! As I have recently acquired my 4th cold since being home I am considering the purchase of a neti pot (yes the pot I previously blogged about which scared the bejesus out of me). Desperate times call for desperate measures people! And in this case it calls for the flushing out of my nasal cavity.

Anyway, I was planning on getting said pot from Whole Foods (hippie organic store sure to carry a neti pot), Jackie told me to get one from Target. An idea I quickly discounted....why would Target carry a neti pot? People, I just looked it up online and they carry not one, but 4! 4 versions of the nose juicer! So tomorrow after my interview for the job that could set me free from the Macy's grasp (think good thoughts for me I need all the good energy I can get) I will be heading to Target, the place where nobody knows my name, but never ceases to amaze me with their wide variety of goods. Thank you Target.

The Neti Pot

So for Christmas my brother-in-law asked for one of these little babies, also known as a "neti pot". I call it the nose juicer. Basically you use this thing to flush out excess snot from your nasal cavity and ease sinus congestion. I watched this video on how to use this little contraption and was thoroughly disturbed by the idea of using this thing. I was then reminded of this image from The Office:


Thus bringing together my elf sock, the neti pot and one of my favorite shows The Office. It all seemed very blog-worthy to me. Again, you are welcome.

Elf foot.....anyone?

Does your foot look like this?

Because if it does I have just the sock for you. As you might know I have taken up knitting in the last year. I've knitted many scarves and hats and recently decided to take on making socks. Well I recently completed my first sock....it's soft and pink and cute.......and made for someone with an elf foot. Minor details I know. I tried my best to jam my own foot into this baby and it's just not gonna happen, so it's up for grabs. You are welcome.

An exciting time

Well I just finished watching President Obama's inauguration speech and I gotta say I was inspired. The man can give a good speech. I'm even more excited to see how his presidency pans out. Bring on the change!

The Obama Circus

I almost never talk about politics, but I'm reaching my breaking point with the prospect of the inauguration. We are in a recession....nearly depression and Obama is spending a whopping 140 MILLION on his inauguration! I do realize that this money is donated, but it still seems a large price to pay to swear someone into office. I know it's a historical event, blah, blah, blah but I can't help thinking that we are going to spend the next 4 years watching this man spend spend spend. That is not the kind of "change" I am looking for. On top of this I just saw a commercial where all the people performing at the inauguration were listed, it was like a commercial for the Grammys. Again donated services which I understand, but it does seem a little over the top.

This is only my first beef, second I am very irritated with the media and their continuous coverage about the upcoming dog purchase and Michelle Obama's redecorating of the White House. These stories have been run more than once on CNN, MSNBC, the radio and my local TV stations. I like Obama for the most part and am very interested to see how his presidency unfolds, but the focus on these little things is quite frankly putting me off a little bit. Ok, I'll get off my soap box now. Just some things I've been thinking about lately.

A New Etsy Store

Well where else can I shamelessly promote my mom's new Etsy store? She's been working hard to make cute pacifier clips for babies in need of a fancier lifestyle. Come check it out here.

That's what I call an overshare

So as you all know I've been doing the "trial pass" thing at various gyms. This week it's LA Fitness....actually a very good gym, but that's beside the point. Today I tried out the AquaFit class (as in water aerobics)....as in Kristi and two old ladies plus the instructor. I gotta say the class was pretty fun and made me laugh several times, but nothing was more strange or uncomfortable than the exchange that too place between myself (in my swimming suit) and a total stranger in the women's locker room.

So I'm standing there and this girl asks if I liked the class and I told her yes, then she goes on to tell me that she was considering going too but her swim suit was too worn out to be seen in public...fair enough. She then went on to tell me how she was persuaded to join when the sales person told her she was so unhealthy she would die prematurely if she didn't start working out there....yikes! (Starting to get uncomfortable) THEN she goes on to tell me about her free personal training session where she asked the trainer to "kick her butt". This did not go well as she started feeling faint, was given some water and an orange to eat, and then threw up in a nearby trash can....and a little on someone's desk. All of this was divulged to me, a total stranger, in the LA Fitness locker room. That's what I call an overshare.

Food Storage

In a recent conversation I was advised that "everyone needs a gun, Kristi." This was followed by a story about the location this person keeps their gun....in their pantry in a can labeled "wild rice". While I do not agree with the idea that everyone needs a gun I do very much enjoy the idea of that storage solution.

"Welcome to the family."

I spent the day with the Cumming's family on Friday and was invited to join them on their yearly excursion to Walmart where they have their family portrait taken. On the way there Jackie in jest says, "Kristi should be in the picture." Knowing that her mom will completely agree with this idea I immediatly give her a stern look...but it was too late, the seed was planted. Yes my friends, Kristi Westberg became part of the Walmart portrait studio experience, complete with changing backgrounds and props. My personal favorite was the hazy twinkly background with little mushrooms where Jackie and I made ridiculous faces a one another. This was closely followed by the fake library background which I couldn't resist.

In the end her mom ordered 36 sheets of photos, many of which were of Jackie and I and some of just me....Jackie was cropped out. Sadly, I do not have the pictures yet, but believe me I will be posting those suckers as soon as I have copies.