It's like porn.....for those with OCD

It's my day off today and I was trying to decide what to do. The list for today included mail something to Jill, drop off my dad's shirts to the dry cleaners, look for more black clothing....Macy's uniform, workout and visit the new HUGE Container Store. To prep for my visit I even went to the website to look at pretty pictures of organized spaces....I know I'm a sad sad girl. Long story short I did all of the things on the list EXCEPT visit organizational heaven. Am I the only one who gets excited by these images? Someone please validate me so I feel a little less like a freak.....I'm totally going there on my next day off.

To quote Rachel, "It's so pretty!"

Who needs food when your pantry is that perfect.

Someday....sigh.

Macy's Moment

I had the following conversation with someone at work today:

Jane: Kristi, you have really beautiful eyes.
Kristi: Thanks
Jane: You should wear makeup to highlight them more
Kristi:.....I am wearing makeup

Here's Hopin'

Well today I have a phone interview with the Intermuseum Conservation Association (ICA). Send out some good vibes.....and pray this interview has no resemblance of my last interview.

I had a customer today names Chastity......isn't that just setting the girl up for failure?

50?!

So I was perusing my parents most recent copy of AARP magazine....which had Dustin Hoffman on the cover when I came across a list of people who are turning 50 this month. I had to do a double take because much to my surprise Flavor Flav was on that list. Seriously.....this dude is about to be 50? Was I the only one who thought he was like 35? What very little respect I had for him was quickly lost once this information was acquired.

One small step

I sent my passport off yesterday for renewal. It expired this month and it suddenly dawned on me that if I wanted to leave the country in a hurry the boarder patrol, customs, and the airline attendants would squash that idea real quick. So off I sent it for a mere $75 I will get my new little book to fill with stamps all over again!

$1

I purchased this hat at Target yesterday for ONE DOLLAR! It's times like these that I love America. To celebrate my fantastic St. Patrick's Day find I decided to call my Irish friend Catherine and have a video conversation with the hat on. I mean how funny would it be to turn on the video and see that on the other end? I found this hilarious...she had no idea what this hat was supposed to be. Either way I laughed about it all day.

Frightening yet hilarious

Today I watched as a 40 something year old lady tried on a pair of purple snake skin patterned leggings.....just the leggings, as in she thought they were pants.

Wrong side of the bed

I was under the impression that I have SOME ability to hide my true feelings when it comes to working at Macy's. Today however that idea was proven incorrect. The following is a list of signals that may have tipped off my co-workers that I was in a bad mood:

1. My refusal to participate in the morning rally where we were supposed to dance the electric slide to get pumped up to sell sell sell......at 8:45 Kristi does no dancing.
2. My lack of friendliness towards several people as I collected the trash cans that are stationed at my rap stand.
3. My decision to re-size the sale rack again in order to prevent myself from having to talk to people.
4. My lack of the use of the word "outstanding". (sarcastic usage excluded)

As it turns out people pick up on these things.....outstanding.

The Line

Well as some of you know I had the pleasure (no I'm not being sarcastic....seriously, I'm not) of driving with Jackie from Philadelphia, PA all the way to Lehi, UT. In case you don't realize it, that's a really long way. This fact was realized when I opened up the map of the USA with our route highlighted.....ONE-----VERY-----LONG-----LINE. In my head I knew this was a long way, however when you look at how far it is on a map, rather than the tiny version in my head you realize how long it truly is.

Our first night of driving Jackie pulled out this map and the flashlight she had stowed in the glove box and began looking at the line. She looked, and looked and looked and looked until I finally asked her how that line was looking. Well, that started a running joke about the line that continued even after we arrived and I was back in Texas. The trip was filled with lots of memorable moments, including me thinking Sapp Brothers was a pancake house....it is in fact a place to get your car fixed, me belting out the best of Garth Brooks when I got my "second wind"....so sorry Jackie, Jackie coming in early during nearly every song she sang, and the two of us periodically loosing our minds. Needless to say it was a very entertaining road trip, one I will never forget....and hopefully never make again. Fingers crossed....keep that line away from me.

Underpants

I was telling Jackie about how I once went to see Michael Flatley Lord of the Dance and just as the show was starting a woman rushed the stage and threw her underwear at him....seriously, it happened.

This conversation prompted discussion on what music stars we would be willing to give such treatment.

My answer: Bono, Chris Martin

Jackie's answer: Josh Groban

It was awesome, and hilarious.

Sometimes I get excited about very small things. Take for instance my new tube of mascara....you forget how crappy your mascara is until you get a new perfect one.

What happens when your phone is smarter than you

So for Christmas Santa brought me a new cell phone. Allowing me to go from a phone something like this....old man not included.

To this little baby.
Needless to say it was a big jump in technology. I mean this thing knows where I am at all times, tells me the weather, keeps my calendar (and boy is it jam packed), allows me to listen to soothing sounds as I go to sleep, calculate tips, find restaurants, gives me a workout program, you name it this thing can do it. It's freaking amazing.

Now the tricky part is what happens when your phone is smarter than you. As of a day and a half ago my phone was not ringing or making any sounds...not even the keyboard clicks. I downloaded the new software, reprogrammed all my settings, blah blah blah. I tried everything. So as a last resort I took it into the ATT store. As I'm waiting there this helper guy asks why I'm there and I tell him about how my phone is not making any sounds. I hand him the phone, he moves the "silent mode" switch on the side and voila it's fixed!....and Kristi is the dumbest iPhone owner out there.

A pointless post

Well I'd like to say that I have exciting news or that something truly entertaining has happened in my life, but that would be a lie. I do however have an overwhelming urge to write a post. Like I said nothing has happened, no forts built or the like, I did however work a lot this week which is a good thing.

I also attended my first aerobics class at LA Fitness (the big winner in my free trial marathon). Cardio Kickboxing was the only class that I could fit into my work schedule so that's how I chose it. I gotta say it kicked my butt but was pretty fun. We'll see how I feel tomorrow, hopefully not as sore as the last time I worked out with Will (the trainer guy) who took away my ability to walk and caused me to consider throwing myself down the stairs in the Stonebriar mall rather than endure the pain of walking down them.

Indicators that your job interview is not going well

1. You are told about the company three times by three different people individually.

2. The other designer reminds you of Jose Eber but with greasy Euro hair in your face type hair-do

(for those of you not familiar this is Jose)

3. You show your portfolio and the interviewer's reply is, "this is it?"
4. You are asked to design something right on the spot, given no indication of what should be put on this card aside from a logo....for Nikon.
5. After being left in the office for 10 minutes Jose comes back in the room and is surprised that all you have so far is the Nikon logo on a yellow background with a made-up phone number
6. And the kicker, you are left in the waiting area for someone to return when the first interviewer walks by and asks why you are standing there.....because the interview is over, but you received no handshake or thank you for coming....or any indication that the interview was in fact finished.

And that in a nut shell is what I can now call the worst job interview I have ever been a part of.

How many posts can I devote to the neti pot?

At least one more. So as promised I purchased my neti pot today, after the worlds worst job interview, more to come on that. I did in fact find this little beauty at Target, it was actually the last one.....this thing must be catching on. Anyway, after much apprehension today I tried it before going to bed and was pleasantly surprised. My nasal passages are clear, my sinuses warmed and soothed and most importantly I can breath through BOTH nostrils at once. It's a little amazing this little pot. Ok, no more neti pot posts....I promise.

All Hail Target!

I'm pretty sure everyone knows how much I LOVE Target. I mean I applied to work for them in India! India! As I have recently acquired my 4th cold since being home I am considering the purchase of a neti pot (yes the pot I previously blogged about which scared the bejesus out of me). Desperate times call for desperate measures people! And in this case it calls for the flushing out of my nasal cavity.

Anyway, I was planning on getting said pot from Whole Foods (hippie organic store sure to carry a neti pot), Jackie told me to get one from Target. An idea I quickly discounted....why would Target carry a neti pot? People, I just looked it up online and they carry not one, but 4! 4 versions of the nose juicer! So tomorrow after my interview for the job that could set me free from the Macy's grasp (think good thoughts for me I need all the good energy I can get) I will be heading to Target, the place where nobody knows my name, but never ceases to amaze me with their wide variety of goods. Thank you Target.

The Neti Pot

So for Christmas my brother-in-law asked for one of these little babies, also known as a "neti pot". I call it the nose juicer. Basically you use this thing to flush out excess snot from your nasal cavity and ease sinus congestion. I watched this video on how to use this little contraption and was thoroughly disturbed by the idea of using this thing. I was then reminded of this image from The Office:


Thus bringing together my elf sock, the neti pot and one of my favorite shows The Office. It all seemed very blog-worthy to me. Again, you are welcome.

Elf foot.....anyone?

Does your foot look like this?

Because if it does I have just the sock for you. As you might know I have taken up knitting in the last year. I've knitted many scarves and hats and recently decided to take on making socks. Well I recently completed my first sock....it's soft and pink and cute.......and made for someone with an elf foot. Minor details I know. I tried my best to jam my own foot into this baby and it's just not gonna happen, so it's up for grabs. You are welcome.

An exciting time

Well I just finished watching President Obama's inauguration speech and I gotta say I was inspired. The man can give a good speech. I'm even more excited to see how his presidency pans out. Bring on the change!

The Obama Circus

I almost never talk about politics, but I'm reaching my breaking point with the prospect of the inauguration. We are in a recession....nearly depression and Obama is spending a whopping 140 MILLION on his inauguration! I do realize that this money is donated, but it still seems a large price to pay to swear someone into office. I know it's a historical event, blah, blah, blah but I can't help thinking that we are going to spend the next 4 years watching this man spend spend spend. That is not the kind of "change" I am looking for. On top of this I just saw a commercial where all the people performing at the inauguration were listed, it was like a commercial for the Grammys. Again donated services which I understand, but it does seem a little over the top.

This is only my first beef, second I am very irritated with the media and their continuous coverage about the upcoming dog purchase and Michelle Obama's redecorating of the White House. These stories have been run more than once on CNN, MSNBC, the radio and my local TV stations. I like Obama for the most part and am very interested to see how his presidency unfolds, but the focus on these little things is quite frankly putting me off a little bit. Ok, I'll get off my soap box now. Just some things I've been thinking about lately.

A New Etsy Store

Well where else can I shamelessly promote my mom's new Etsy store? She's been working hard to make cute pacifier clips for babies in need of a fancier lifestyle. Come check it out here.

That's what I call an overshare

So as you all know I've been doing the "trial pass" thing at various gyms. This week it's LA Fitness....actually a very good gym, but that's beside the point. Today I tried out the AquaFit class (as in water aerobics)....as in Kristi and two old ladies plus the instructor. I gotta say the class was pretty fun and made me laugh several times, but nothing was more strange or uncomfortable than the exchange that too place between myself (in my swimming suit) and a total stranger in the women's locker room.

So I'm standing there and this girl asks if I liked the class and I told her yes, then she goes on to tell me that she was considering going too but her swim suit was too worn out to be seen in public...fair enough. She then went on to tell me how she was persuaded to join when the sales person told her she was so unhealthy she would die prematurely if she didn't start working out there....yikes! (Starting to get uncomfortable) THEN she goes on to tell me about her free personal training session where she asked the trainer to "kick her butt". This did not go well as she started feeling faint, was given some water and an orange to eat, and then threw up in a nearby trash can....and a little on someone's desk. All of this was divulged to me, a total stranger, in the LA Fitness locker room. That's what I call an overshare.

Food Storage

In a recent conversation I was advised that "everyone needs a gun, Kristi." This was followed by a story about the location this person keeps their gun....in their pantry in a can labeled "wild rice". While I do not agree with the idea that everyone needs a gun I do very much enjoy the idea of that storage solution.

"Welcome to the family."

I spent the day with the Cumming's family on Friday and was invited to join them on their yearly excursion to Walmart where they have their family portrait taken. On the way there Jackie in jest says, "Kristi should be in the picture." Knowing that her mom will completely agree with this idea I immediatly give her a stern look...but it was too late, the seed was planted. Yes my friends, Kristi Westberg became part of the Walmart portrait studio experience, complete with changing backgrounds and props. My personal favorite was the hazy twinkly background with little mushrooms where Jackie and I made ridiculous faces a one another. This was closely followed by the fake library background which I couldn't resist.

In the end her mom ordered 36 sheets of photos, many of which were of Jackie and I and some of just me....Jackie was cropped out. Sadly, I do not have the pictures yet, but believe me I will be posting those suckers as soon as I have copies.

Macy's Moments

So I realize that it is VERY stupid for one to blog about their work, however since the only thing happening in my life right now involves Macy's I feel I have no choice. Therefore I will proceed with a little series of posts I will call "Macy's Moments".

Dear Macy's,

What is the protocol for an associate to follow when a customer has an entire conversation with themself in another language while you are ringing up their purchases?

A. Ignore ignore ignore
B. Ask, "would you or your friend like to open up a Macy's credit card?"
C. Offer your opinion on any subject you desire in a third language
D. All of the above

Love,
Kristi

The bad news:
Have had 2 colds and one stomach flu since arriving back in Texas

The bright side:
Thanks to my poor health I have lost 7 pounds.....now we know how to keep off those holiday pounds.

Dear Dallas Radio Stations,

I am begging you to stop playing Taylor Swift, Love Story. LAME.

Love,
Kristi

Making the rounds

So my plan to join a gym has been somewhat faltered by the fact that I make a whopping $100 a week on average, making a monthly gym payment a bit unreachable right now. In an effort to not have to run outside when it's REALLY cold (as in your lungs start to burn) I have started my tour of Frisco health clubs via the genius of the "7-day free pass".

So far I have worked my way through LifeTime Fitness and 24 Hour Fitness. Next up LA Fitness. That's nearly a month of free gym usage people! Clubs I can still mooch off of include Bally's Total Fitness, Snap Fitness, and if I'm desperate enough Curves. 4 out of 5 of these clubs includes the word fitness in the title....just had to mention that. Anyway, between 24 and LifeTime I vote LifeTime, however if you are unable to pay the $79 per month to join you may want to join the gym rats of the Frisco 24 Hour Fitness for the small price of $29.99 a month. The only downside to this evil plan.....gym sales people calling you non-stop to find out how your pass is working and pressuring you to join now before the incredible deal they have offered you expires!

Something I've been wondering

Why does Charlie Brown have male patterned baldness? He's a little kid. Does he have alopecia?

Things that are hard to do:

1. Get Jenna's dog Max to wear a Christmas wreath around his neck

2. Putting a Santa hat and beard on her other dog Hogan
3. Making them pose for a Christmas picture

But the outcome was pretty funny.

You may experience some discomfort

So yesterday I went into Denton to do a little returning of things/purchasing of Christmas gifts. I went into a dressing room to try on some clothes in Target and there was a women in the room next door. During the some 15 minutes I was in there she managed to sound like she was birthing a child and produce an enormous belch. I have to say I was pretty disgusted...and also wondered whether she managed to get on what I can only assume was her very own sausage casing.

My New OCD

So I recently joined My Food Diary in an effort to keep better track of what I'm putting in myself. I realize this service sounds crazy and has the potential to make me truly obsessed with keeping tabs on myself, but so far it has been pretty interesting. You put in everything you eat in a day, the exercise you do (if you are doing that) and it tells you whether you need to make changes to meet your goals. So far I've found out it likes when you eat healthy and is not so fond of you when you decide to have some Blue Bell Cookies 'n Cream ice cream.....who'd have guessed. Anyway, I'll be sure to let you know how it goes.

The Funniest Part of My Black Friday

I was walking towards a customer at work today when she shot me a look like I was growing a set of horns. Next thing I know she is staring at me and telling me how I look just like her sister.....did I mention this girl was black? It took a LOT of will power to not laugh at that moment.

Sodaman

Today I was passing by a Sonic in my car and there was a man dressed up as a huge sonic beverage. As I drove by a person was walking towards him. The sodaman threw his giant sign at the man, turned and ran away. It was pretty funny.

I joined the masses

Well this weekend I too went to see what some will call the blockbuster of our time....those people are most likely about 10 or more years younger than me, but it will be said. You guessed it, I saw Twilight....keep reading Jenny. I was surprised by two things:

1. The character called Jasper was channeling his inner Edward Scissorhands in order to play his non-speaking role. To make the likeness even greater he spent a lot of time shuffling around in the background and looking pouty.


2. Mike Dexter....of Can't Hardly Wait (in case you didn't know I LOVE THIS MOVIE....Annalise will attest to that) played the vampire dad to his clan of vampire children. You've come a long way Mike, and nobody called him a fag in this movie, movin' up.


Anyway for those of you who were even considering reading the book...or worse watching the movie instead of reading the book...don't do it! I must admit I enjoyed the book, but watching it being played out on screen made me want to vomit several times. Thank goodness Scissorhands and Mike Dexter were there to hold things together.

Training Day

Well I went through register training at Macy's today, 4.5 hours with me, a computer, a training CD, and a register. It wasn't too bad really, and the good news is I passed.

Now the bad news. I received my work schedule for the next 3 weeks.....I am scheduled to work two days. Wait, it gets worse, one of those days is the day after Thanksgiving.....and the shift is from 4:45am to 1pm. I know, there are no words.

I have news....

Some will find this to be good.....others, bad (Jenny).

I just finished Twilight.

So I hate to keep playing this card, but I got another job yesterday. After a VERY long group interview and this little scenario:

Me: (sitting trying to look like a good potential employee)
Ali: (guy applying to work at Macy's who did not speak English)
Ali: Pointing to the question "Why do you want to work at Macy's?"
Me: I would write what you like about Macy's
Ali: I like Macy's

And that's about as far as I could get with him. Anyway, after a 2.5 hour process I was completely signed on to work the holiday season, and the pay is a bit higher and there are more hours than the Bath & Body Works job. So there you go, job number two!

You speak German....how about Chinese?

When I open up Firefox on my computer everything is in German. I know one German person....how did this happen? When I tried to use my dad's scanner somehow the display screen with all the instructions changed to Chinese. Is this a new power and if so how can I harness it?

On another note I got a job today....don't get excited. You are now officially reading the blog of a Bath & Body Works employee...part-time....seasonal. Can't get much lower than that.

The Turkey Show

Tonight I went to Kate's 1st grade show honoring the great tradition of Thanksgiving. As they are singing a song devoted to McDonald's, Pizza Hut, and Kentucky Fried Chicken (you know the song I'm talking about) my brother-in-law Eddie turns to me and says....."this is what our tax dollars are paying for".

When the goin' gets tough

the tough apply for a design job with Target in India....I'm not even kidding.

The right hand side of my facebook page seems to always have ads for some sort of diet food, diet plan, diet scam. I find this both annoying and insulting. Just had to let you know.

Number of jobs I've applied for in the last 2 days.....12
Number of episodes of The West Wing I've watched in that same amount of time.....12
Ounces of diet coke consumed........120

Just wanted to keep you updated on my vacation.

Pictures pictures pretty pretty pictures

Update

What I have done since arriving in Utah:

1. Had Rio twice
2. Been massaged by Ramon....awesome
3. Gone to Annalise's wedding...again awesome
4. Watched all of season 2 of 30Rock....in one day
5. Laughed endlessly

Boredom's Death Grip

Yes my friends, I saw this movie today. I not only saw it but I went to the 10:45am showing set aside for people to bring their screaming children to. Lucky for me there were only 2 fairly well-behaved children who screamed only two or three times. I'm not saying this movie was brilliant, it had no ground breaking meaningful sub-plot or even multiple laugh-out-loud moments, but it filled the void between 10:45 and noon, something I am grateful for. I spent the majority of the movie trying to figure out where I had seen one of the girls in the movie (Kat Dennings) and had to look her up to remember that she was in Charlie Bartlett....another movie I recently rented on iTunes to fill some time. Anyway there were a couple decent laughs during the movie, but all in all not great, the best part was having Diet Coke and Maltesers (malt balls) for breakfast.

Dear Adam,

Why am I uninvited to your blog? I read it and even comment!

Love,
Kristi

Deja vu

Yesterday I went to London to volunteer at the London Metropolitan Archives cleaning old wills...a little boring to be hontst. But, the strange thing was I have never been there so I came up from the underground at Farringdon station to discover I did knew where I was. Then I followed my map to a street called Bowling Green Lane....very familiar again and quickly discovered a red door with the letters BUNAC. This was the place Annalise and I went three years ago to sort out our visas and jobs when we came to England and it is right next to the Archives...crazy!

A Welcome Visitor

Yesterday I had a visit from an antiques dealer who I did some work for during my MA. I had a fantastic opportunity to work on a Chinese paper fan...a job which turned out to be both time consuming and "fiddly" as they say in this country. As I am flying to Utah in 13 days he offered to come to Brighton to bring payment for the job in person. As is the custom in England I invited him in and we had coffee and something yummy and a chat. He was very encouraging and made sure to tell me several times that I need to get my name out there and remember that it takes time to get a career started. By the end of the coffee he left leaving me a bit more hopeful and my pocket book a little more full. A good visit in deed.

Object of Desire

I recently saw this little beauty in a random shop in Brighton and have decided I need it. If only I had money.....it's entitled "Owl Tree". If you want to see more from this gallery go here.


On another note I will be coming to Utah on October 21st, Annalise already has dibs on picking me up from the airport.

Cling film?

In the UK people do not use the term "Saran Wrap", instead they refer to the clear plastic stuff as "cling film". After making a shopping list the other day I mentioned to Catherine that we were out of Saran wrap (which prompted her to repeat my phrase in a REALLY American accent). Much to my surprise and entertainment the shopping list said "cerrang wrap" when I looked at the final list. It should also be mentioned that the Irish love to use the letters "g" and "h"....often silently. So you can only imagine how entertaining I found the idea that we would be going to Tesco to purchase a roll of cerrang wrap. Needless to say, it was awesome.

Dear Readership,

I am currently trying to catch up on the many movies I have missed as of late. Any suggestions would be welcome. Did anyone see Forgetting Sarah Marshall? Do I need to see this movie? I feel like I do....let me know.

Love,
Kristi

Lucky Stuff

I saw a box of Lucky Charms in a grocery store today.
Cost: £5.99 (nearly $12)
I nearly bought it, but my better judgement got a hold of me and I walked away.

My busy schedule

Well I have been adapting to a life of unemployment and self-directed activities. So far it's not going too bad. I've managed to sort out some birthday cards as I recently discovered that I know a lot of people with birthdays in September/October/November.

I've been on the search for a new swimming pool so I can continue my weekly swimming routine. So far one has been very small and the other a 35minute walk away....meaning by the time I walk there and back I've already done a workout excluding the swimming. Other than that I've just been knitting, sleeping, visiting Internet cafes, and doing a lot of walking around. Not too bad really. I have discovered that good American television comes on here between 8:30 and 10am. I've been starting my days with a dose of Will & Grace followed by Frasier.

Don't worry I have been applying for jobs in the meantime as well.

Exchanging things

So I realize that the economy is falling to pieces, but I just withdrew £100 from an ATM and rather than that costing me the usual $200 it was $171!!!!!! Hip hip hooray for the pound loosing its tight grip!!!!!!

Leaving West Dean

Well, my dream two years has come to a close and I have spent the last few hours packing up room 8 of the Dower house. Sad, but true. Just to keep you all up to date I have no job and will be living in Brighton for a month or so until around October 21st...when I will hopefully be returning to America for Annalise's wedding! Than who knows.....

Dear Readership,

I printed my thesis today!!!!!!!

Love,
Kristi

Poochie-pooh

So there are a lot of dogs in England...people here are dog people. This has led me to start my search for the perfect dog....as it turns out there are lots of these. Most recently I have discovered this little guy....he's a Goldendoodle. His name (at least the name I would give him) is Mr. Brown and someday he or some other dog that I think is equally cute will be mine.

Things I'm gonna do after 3pm September 12th

1. Sleep
2. Sleep some more
3. Sit and do nothing....like the good ole' days with Kristin and Jenny....only without Kristin and Jenny....that's a little sad.
4. Read the rest of the Narnia series
5. Start a knitting factory so everyone gets Christmas presents
6. Watch movies....whilst knitting
7. Not think about pop-up books
8. Blog about all the nothing I'm doing
9. Go swimming and possibly run over old ladies
10. And sleep some more

Oh....and look for a job and figure out what I'm going to do with my life...minor details and things to think about whilst knitting.

I was looking on the gap website today and noticed that many of the items listed under the heading "Loungewear" I would put on as everyday clothes....is that wrong?

How is it already September 1st?!

When I logged out of my hotmail account today one of the news stories was "how to get sexy tresses"...I didn't actually read the story but I'm sure it said something like. "Be sure to put your hair in a wet bun everyday....that's hot". See, I don't need them.

Bad luck

Not too much going on here, however they are doing work in the stairwell leading up to the books department workshop and have decided to put a ladder on the stairs....meaning to get into the workshop you have to walk under a ladder. This is not good karma and considering I only have 2 1/2 weeks of my MA left I would appreciate not being made to do such things.

Been a long time since I made a list

Things I sometimes find myself missing (aside from the obvious family and friends)
1. 32oz. Diet Cokes
2. Driving a car
3. Target
4. Target....it must be mentioned twice
5. Having a job....I'm sure that will change once I have one again
6. The Office......I still need to see last season
7. Meeting Jenny at PetsMart
8. My large collection of shoes that are collecting dust in my closet at home
9. Did I mention Target?
10. Shenanigans in general

Dolphin Derby

Well I realize it's hard to see from this picture, but this is what is known as the "Dolphin Derby"! I met up with some people on the Brighton Pier this weekend and managed to convince everyone that this game needed to be played. Basically each person has a dolphin and in order to make them go you play ski-ball. Sounds simple...and lets face it it is, but very fun. AND made even better by the team of two people running it giving a play by play of the dolphin's progress. I only managed to come in second...and there is no huge stuffed fish for second...so sad. All I could think about was when Bob Vance of Vance Refrigeration sent that huge stuffed teddy bear to Philis and she had to carry it home on her back. Anyway, i did see a guy hauling one of these fish down the seafront and it was pretty entertaining.

.....I realize that was a boring post, but I couldn't look at that disgusting picture of liver and bacon anymore.

Liver and Bacon

Yesterday Sonia was going into town and kindly offered to give me a lift as I was about to run out of contact solution. So in we went and she had a physio appointment so I had some time to stroll around Chichester for a bit to kill time. When she returned I had some good stuff including Chicken Tikka Masala and green beans for my dinner. She mentioned that she would have invited me to dinner at hers, but Stephen was cooking liver and bacon (which she knew I would not eat), therefore I was not invited. I told her about what I had bought to eat and she offered to let me come to her house and eat there (my dinner) while they had their liver and bacon. While we were all eating it crossed my mind that maybe I should try a little bit just to make sure I did in deed not like it, however in the end my brain could not let go of the fact that it was LIVER.....and I thought to myself, you have all your life to try this, why not wait until next time.

Today somebody asked me if I was Canadian.....rarely am I so insulted....sorry Canada.

Ridding the world of birds one squirt at a time

So I know that picking on defenseless animals is wrong, but sometimes you gotta let them know who's boss. I went to Catherine's this weekend to enjoy the Brighton seaside and decided that all the pigeons and seagulls that hang around her top floor flat were annoying me a little too much this weekend. As an experiment I decided to see how long it would take them to realize landing on the roof was a bad idea...to do so I filled an empty dish washing soap bottle with water (and a little soap...these birds probably need a little "Fairy Liquid" cleaning. Every time they landed on the roof I crept up to the window and aimed my fairy gun at them to scare them away. While this might make me seem like a complete nutter ...which it does, it did manage to keep me entertained most of the weekend. Sadly it had nearly no effect on the birds whatsoever.

So I'm googling something this morning and what is the little picture on the homepage? Yes, that is a drawing of someone battling it out on the badminton court.

SERIOUSLY! I know I just complained about his in the last post, but I just turned on the Olympics and what was on?......BADMINTON!

Since the Olympics have started I've noticed several things:
1. There is very little coverage of US athletes (understandable....I am in England)
2. The English participate in very different sports than Americans (or they televise VERY different sports)

Let me elaborate. When turning on the television to see what's going on in Beijing the following sports were being covered: archery, sailing, horse jumping, shooting.....SERIOUSLY! What about running, swimming, diving, gymnastics?! SAILING!? REALLY?! Needless to say none of those sports make for thrilling TV. There is however a big interest in Michael Phelps, so much so that they have a card board cut-out of him and every time he wins a gold medal they put a fake one around his card board neck....pretty funny really.

Dear Jenny,

Ne-Yo: Closer - LOVE IT

2. Estelle+Kanye: American Boy - LOVE IT

3. Timbaland: Come & Get Me - NICE

4. Pitbull: Go Girl - Pitbull? Wow, nice name....but good song.

5. Miri Ben-Ari & Styles P: We Gonna Win - Am thinking I should have bought the clean version of this baby, it's a little intense...but good

Very well done J! I knew you would pull through for me.

Love,
Kristi

A Day Out

So I mentioned that I would write about my little trip to London to see The Merry Wives of Windsor, and now I shall. On Saturday Catherine and I took the train up to London and had a little lunch at Borough Market before walking over to the theatre. It was raining a little, just that misty kind of rain, but by the time we arrived for the show it was full on raining. The Globe has an open top and as standing tickets were only 5 pounds we were the "groundlings" of the theatre as in standing right under the hole where the rain was coming in. The show did go on and two "emergency ponchos" were purchased so we watched the play in our stylish clear plastic bags.

I really enjoyed it and all the actors and costumes were fantastic. The story is about a man who moves into town with very little money and decides to court two wealthy women to relieve him of his poverty. He sends the exact same letter to each woman and as they are friends they tell one another only to find out that they are both being courted by the same man with the same letter. In retaliation they decided to play lots of tricks on him including convincing him to hide in a giant laundry basket that is dumped into the Thames and dressing up as a fat old woman. It turned out to be very funny and enjoyable in spite of the rain and a very fun day out.

BareMinerals?! Just say no!

Ok, I know I said I would write about my trip to London to see The Merry Wives of Windsor and I will, but this happened first so I'm gonna post pone that story until tomorrow.

I had a big deadline on Friday and to reward myself for getting 8000 words of my thesis written I decided I would buy myself some new foundation since I recently ran out. Jill uses BareMinerals and always seems to look put together and much more nicely made-up than myself so I decided to give it a try. I headed into this store here called Champneys where I've seen it in the store and asked if they would put some on me before I made the financial commitment.

So the girl started by trying a couple colors on me and made a decision that I am pale and pasty before putting a butt load of the minerals on my face. I've seen the infomercial and it says to put a very tiny bit of the minerals on the brush, tap it on the lid, then swirl the brush in the lid then apply. Well this girl decided to put half the container on the brush, not tap it off or swirl it in the lid....meaning my face received the equivalent of 4 months worth of make-up in one fowl swoop. She then told me to look in the mirror which was poorly lit and even in the dim light I could see the caked makeup on my face. So now my dilemma first I had to say I do not in fact want to spend 47 pounds on this stuff and two I had to leave the store looking like a freak. So I left and went across the road to another more reputable make-up place and had a girl remove the BareMinerals and put on another make-up which was much better. I guess the purpose of this post is.....BareMinerals....JUST SAY NO!

Millions of Peaches

Well this morning I went for a run around the arboretum at West Dean and on my way back I stopped by the glass houses in the garden where they are currently growing peaches and nectarines. When you walk in it is like you are bathing in fresh fruit smells....very yummy. I secretly and very sneakily picked a white peach and a nectarine then headed back to my room. (you're not really supposed to pick the fruit, but as I am a full time student and West Dean is my home I see no problem in my picking the fruit....not to mention the butt load of money I'm paying to be here so what's a little peach gonna hurt?) Anyway, as I was eating the delicious fruit I started thinking how lucky I have been to be here for the last 2 years and got a little sad that I only have 5 weeks left.

On another less depressing note I am going to see The Merry Wives of Windsor at Shakespeare's Globe Theatre in London this weekend and am very excited. I will report back on Monday.

Dear Jenny,

I feel I am missing out on rap and hip hop music....please provide me with a list of solid songs I have been missing out on during the last two years...please.

Love,
Kristi

Lookie lookie

So I took some time to make my own super hero prompted by Annalise. I call her Trashy K......what should her powers be?

HP

They showed a preview for the new Harry Potter on the news here this morning....needless to say I'm a little excited!!!!!!!!!!!

"A Choral Clash"

So this weekend I went to Brighton to see Catherine, enjoy the sunny weather and try to make myself a little less white. After two glorious days in the sun I was a little burned and a bit tanner and very hot. Anyway, in the evening we turned on the TV while eating dinner and were amazed to find a show called "Last Choir Standing"! That's right! An entire show dedicated to choirs dueling it out with cheesy smiles and choreography to boot. It was unbelievable...and obviously had to be shared with you.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r4Q9PctXU0E

This one gave me goose bumps...I know I'm a total choir nerd.

A new hobby

Well I have taken up a new hobby which I know nothing about but have managed to endure so far. A couple other girls go to the Chichester pool three days a week to swim laps and as I need more exercise and recently became worried that my lung capacity was lacking I decided to join up. Until today I've been swimming sans contacts and goggles...as in I'm swimming with strange blob people and craning to keep my head above water so I'm not constantly rubbing my eyes. So far I've just been doing the breast stroke (which I'm sure I'm doing wrong) and occasionally I get brave and do the back stroke. I am also unwilling to swim laps in the slow lane with the 80+ year olds who seem to just bob along which means I am swimming in the "medium" lane with the slightly more athletic yet still aged swimmers.

So I was swimming along and trying to keep a little ways behind this lady who seemed to be turning the crawl into a much harder stroke than it is...no rhythm and kind of looked like she was drowning at times. Well as I said before I got brave and started doing the back stroke because she seemed to be a good distance away from me, however half way through the lap I suddenly discovered I was mowing her down and receiving a death look from a lady with a tiny pink nose plug. I did manage to keep a straight face when apologizing, but I'm not gonna lie it was pretty tough.

Luckily my order for a pair of goggles came in yesterday and today I enjoyed a clear visioned swim and actually managed to not drown anyone.

Thanks but no thanks

Well I got a letter from the John Rylands yesterday saying I didn't get the job which is kind of sad because I really liked the library and the people I met who work there. They also had an exhibition on miniature books that was completely amazing. Oh well, maybe next time.

To Manchester I go....

Well today I am heading to Manchester for a job interview at the John Rylands Library which is part of the University of Manchester. In my head Manchester is cold and dark, but several people have assured me that this is not the case. Anyway, it is a 6 month contract...and the first interview I have been offered other than the interview with Library of Congress so I'm pretty excited and a little nervous. I will be sure to tell you how it goes and hopefully return with a couple interesting stories.

Fun fun

Well my parents left to go back to Texas today...sad. The trip was really fun and filled with entertainment and the usual family disfunction. I have to say that the driving was by far the most entertaining. Rather than take my advice and rent an automatic car my mom went for the standard transmission.....she did not think of the fact that the drivers seat is on the right side and you shift with your left hand....plus you are driving on the other side of the road. Minor details. The first day in the drive from the airport to West Dean I actually thought I might have a stroke several times. Entering a round about without looking for the oncoming traffic is a little bit scary, but it must be said that my Dad caught on quickly and by the end of the trip the driving was far less scary.

Dear Readership,

My parents arrive at London Gatwick tomorrow!!!!!

Just though you would want to know.

Love,
Kristi

I want my very own Aslan

This weekend I went to see Prince Caspian and let me tell you I thoroughly enjoyed it. Sometimes I think I like every movie I see here because they are seen so far and few between. Decreasing my movie watching seems to have made me a little more appreciative of what I actually get to see, that said when I saw 27 Dresses it was thoroughly painful. But anyway, by the end of Prince Caspian I had a new dream, what was that dream? To have my own pet Lion to offer me knowledge and snuggly cuddles.

Hard Times

Well readership, it's hard times out there. The economy is failing us. Housing prices are falling while interest rates are rising. Kristin is getting letters from politicians. Jenny has the attention span of a fruit fly....apparently. Muppets are being killed off, and Annalise is being subjected to bad local art. More importantly, my blog has severely suffered this year. Taking such hits as measly "haha" comments, or no commentary at all. I don't blame you readership, I only have myself to blame for this rapid downfall in funny and lack of true entertainment value. As the summer approaches and I am faced with writing a 10,000 word thesis about pop-up books....I know, cry for Kristi. It will be my goal to "up the funny" and bring new life to los blog. May I not disappoint you.

Show & Tell

Well I just thought I would give you an update on my progress in my MA study. So far I've gained a lot of respect for paper architects and had a lot of fun making interesting things.

Here is the front cover of my pop-up book structure...pretty in pink.

I decided to fill it with these coils for fun.

This little baby took me a very long time, and made my poor tiny brain very tired.

A box!

Turn the wheel and the little arm moves from here...

To here.

My New 100% Hybrid Lifestyle

Today I started my 100% hybrid lifestyle. What is that you ask? Well it's what happens when you purchase a pair of orange shoes that look like these:

They come in a box like this:

And they apparently keep my toes safe from the unexpected, keep my foot cradled in a metatomical footbed, the quindensity midsole allows free flex during "toe-off", they are made of all natural sustainable materials (and are recyclable) where you take shoes to be recycled I have no idea, and they are waterproof yet breathable.

I gotta say of all those awesome features my favorite is the use of the phrase "toe-off", not sure what it means but I fully intend on incorporating that word into my everyday life. Example 1: when leaving a party "ok guys, I'm gonna toe-off" Example 2: Used when angry "TOE-OFF!" Example 3: when describing your wicked dance moves "so I was gettin my toe-off, when...." see endless uses. Lets hope I enjoy my new kicks as much as the word toe-off.

The Anti-shoe....

Have you heard of these things? They're called MBT which stands for Masai Barefoot Technology. So they are these strange looking shoes which have a curved sole so you can rock back and forth on them or side to side. They are supposed to distribute the pressure of walking on your entire foot rather than the heel and ball of the foot. They also help your posture, tone your butt, thighs and calves as well as strengthen your lower back. All this for the low low price of $245! So I tried on a pair this weekend mainly because they have all these ads for them in the magazines I've been purchasing lately and they all say MBT "the anti-shoe" so that got me wondering what that meant not to mention that the magazine was mentioning them in several articles and I had no idea what they were which made reading the article a bit annoying.....put things in context for those of us not up to date on what I would consider to be mainstream orthopedic shoes. While I consider them to be one small step below the Crocs on the scale of ugly shoes, they were very comfortable and made walking little more fun, kind of like bobbing up and down and little bit. That said, if I'm gonna spend that kind of money on a pair of shoes they are gonna be prettier, higher and most likely look like these.

Two things I've been thinking about lately

I know that Annalise already wrote a post about the security efforts of Blogger, but everytime I see that little message box all I can see is the handicapped symbol. Does it mean that this is to help the handicapped? Are they implying that you would have to be handicapped to not be able to fill in the box?....and if that is the case how insulting to the handicapped and the non-handicapped. Does anyone know why it's there?

Second, I love Raisin Bran....and Raisin Bran Crunch....yummmmmmm! Anyway, here they have "Sultana Bran" and Raisin Bran, but they look and taste pretty much exactly the same. So my other question is what is a Sultana? I have surveyed many people and received a different answer from every person. I finally remembered to look it up on Wikipedia (a very reputable source) and found out that a sultana is, you will be happy to know that it is a white seedless grape from Turkey or Iran that is made into what I would call a raisin. So there you have it, just wanted to get those things out there so you would have a greater understanding of the ridiculous spiral of information swirling around inside my peas-sized brain.

Blast from the past

This weekend I visited Bodium Castle with Catherine and was taken back to the days of study abroad. In my mind this was the first day trip we took...whether that is correct or not I am not sure, but I do remember not being good friends with the usual crew yet so it must have been early on. It has changed a little since my last visit, there is now a tea room and a shop which I don't remember at all. There were also lots and lots of English people basking in the sun and having yummy looking picnics....I recall this place being completely dead when we arrived. Either way both visits were educational as well as entertaining. As far as castles go it's quite small and the inside is almost totally ruined, but you can climb a tall spiral staircase and see beautiful country views from the tops of the towers. Not too shabby for a Sunday afternoon.